CrimQuips
CrimQuips 1/21/03 Tuesday, January 21, 2003
Commentary by Barry Crimmins
http://www.barrycrimmins.com Congratulations! There is now less time left in Bush's court-appointed term than he has already disserved --although much more than any of us ever deserved.
Hooray for the peace rallies in Washington, San Francisco and everywhere else! I'd have joined the hundreds of thousands of D.C. protesters, who braved weather colder than Nancy Reagan's heart, had I not been recovering from oral surgery and still bleeding.
Then again, the smell of blood might have been the one thing that would have attracted W to the rally. Actually, the smell of blood would have sent W scurrying to Nebraska but Shadow Emperor Cheney might have emerged from his crypt.
In any case, congratulations to all the participants for making such an eloquent collective statement against war. Excuse me if this is impertinent but aren't empty warheads the sort of thing we should be hoping the UN inspectors find?
Our current dilemma can be summarized thusly: an empty suit wants to use empty warheads to fill real graves.
In fairness, it must be remembered that Bush wants to fill pockets as well. Of course the pockets he wants to fill are already so jammed with lucre that oil company executives will soon have to start wearing cargo pants.
But please, nothing smaller than thousand-dollar bills! Cargo pants pockets aren't that big.
Secretary of War (retro titles for retro people) Donald Rumsfeld says the US has nearly exhausted all diplomatic options concerning Iraq. It's funny how almost no diplomacy exhausts America but it always has plenty of energy for war. And plenty of wars for energy.
His Iraq lunacy has so outraged the rest of the world that W couldn't beat the Ebola virus in an international popularity contest.
***** The Court-Appointed Bush Administration's insistence upon arresting and prosecuting medicinal marijuana growers and patients is consistent with everything it stands for.
First- Big Pharma doesn't get a cut and W believes no drug should reach sick people unless those scoundrels get the first and largest taste.
Second - Medicinal marijuana arrests will help overcrowd jails so that when justice eventually reaches the truly criminal enterprise in the White House, the odds will favor probation or light sentences for Bushists. In other words : Fill the Jails! (with other people)
Third - Medicinal marijuana was approved by California voters in 1996. If there is one thing the Court-Appointed Bush Administration cannot abide it is the will of an electorate with which it disagrees.
*******
As a tribute to the country that produces the majority of its products, America's largest retailer is considering renaming itself: The Great Wal-Mart of China. Sonny Perdue, the new Republican governor of Georgia (I think he beat Junior Tyson), has promised a statewide referendum on whether or not to return the Confederate battle emblem to the state flag. Polls indicate that residents of the purported center of the "New South" will vote to return the rallying symbol of slavery to their state banner. As of now the only hope is to add a new flag, featuring a swastika, to the list of ballot choices, thereby dividing the Confedrate battle emblem vote
Cutting down on its traditionally long commute to the truth on Venezuela, the New York Times failed to immediately indict Chavez supporters for shootings yesterday when it reported, "Each side blamed the other for the violence." In the past the Times would have immediately pinned the violence Chavez, only to be proven wrong. Of course in the past the Times still had reporters who had not yet been exposed as being anti-Chavez operatives. Until it can line up a new propagandist, the NYT is relegated to printing Reuters accounts. Thus the upgrade to half-truths. Let's cut to the chase, no matter what anyone tells you Condaleezza Rice's and Colin Powell's high-level collaboration with the court-appointed Bush Administration is nothing but an insult to the legacy of Martin Luther King . At the time of his assassination (by the same type of bigots Bush services and is currently attempting to elevate on the federal bench) Dr. King was a vocal and articulate opponent of the Vietnam War. His legacy was alive and well at the peace marches that highlighted the holiday weekend in his honor - a holiday cavemen like George W. Bush never wanted.
No matter what anyone tells you, King's legacy will never accompany Powell and Rice into a cynical and sinister war for oil. **** Combining its penchant for gluttonous oil consumption with its never-ending quest to pander to wealthy and corporate interests, W's latest tax scam actually allow businesses to immediately deduct the entire price of fully-loaded XXL S.U.V.'s, such as the Hummer H2, the Lincoln Navigator, the Ford Expedition and the Toyota Land Cruiser. And then it allows a myriad of additional deductions as their "investment" depreciates. According to the fringe-whacko, tree-hugging environmentalists at the New York Times, ".... a business owner, taking full advantage, could buy a BMW X5 sport utility vehicle for a few hundred dollars more than a Pontiac Bonneville sedan."
Next Bush will come up with a tax break to help compensate business people for all the time they lose pulling their mammoth vehicles into gas stations.
This flimflam doesn't just apply to businesses that could have some plausibly believable use for such large vehicles, it also applies to doctors, accountants, insurance agents and so on. Just how much paper can one accountant push? Or haul? I mean outside of the Andersen accountants who hauled ass to get as many Enron documents into the shredder and out of the building as quickly as possible..
***
Speaking to a predominantly African-American church congregation on MLK Day, Bush suggested that faith was the only way to overcome prejudice....because his administration has no interest whatsoever in tackling the issue
I have faith-- in the power of constitutional provisions that allow us to impeach scumbags like George W. Bush. I've never seen FOX's "Joe Millionaire" but according to an ad, this guy makes 19 grand a year operating heavy construction equipment. How about joining a union, Joe? And why is it so shocking that people could be conned into believing some poor moron is actually a rich moron? Hell, millions of people (who get their news from FOX) already believe some rich moron is actually a legitimate president.
And unless I missed it, FOX discreetly stopped using the NASCAR promo that featured a Confederate flag. Maybe the good folks of Georgia will rise up and force FOX to bring it back. With its racist symbols (pan any crowd more than five yards and you'll see a Confedrate flag) and obscenely conspicuous consumption of petroleum, is there anything more perfect for the court-appointed Bush era than NASCAR? *** Private Victory -- Public Loss
Nancy Victory, an assistant commerce secretary and the Court-appointed Bush Administration's top official for telecommunications policy, let lobbyists for wireless companies help pay for a party celebrating her new job. 10 days later she urged a major policy change that removed restrictions on cellular phone Goliaths. She never reported this gift on her government disclosure forms. "Many of the attendees had nothing to do with that issue," an indignant Victory said when questioned about this ethical imbroglio. Right -- they came to the party at her Virginia home with spouses or friends who were interested in the issue but they had nothing to do with it themselves. Obviously only some of the guests were focused on that one issue. It isn't as if she's stupid enough to waste a party like that on bribes centered on a single area of her influence. No doubt she has been doing favors for everything from the shrimp to the champagne ever since this October 2001 gala. Who cares if it was held within sniffing distance of the smoky carnage at the Pentagon? It was time for the country to get back to normal and normal under this regime meant that a horrific tragedy wasn't about to ball up the wheels of corruption. As we were to see again and again, 9/11 greased those crooked wheels -- as often as not with oil. But anyone willing to tithe the taxes Bush helps them dodge and present that fraction for use by the Republiscam National Committee receives prompt and courteous service for whatever they need fixed, overlooked or subsidized. So this assistant commerce secretary is just another Victory for corrupt corporate interests.
Now that we all have her cell number, it's time to call Nancy Victory and tell her to Lose her job.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Please click to sign up for the e-mail version of :CrimQuips List.
© 2003 Barry Crimmins
http://www.barrycrimmins.com Congratulations! There is now less time left in Bush's court-appointed term than he has already disserved --although much more than any of us ever deserved.
Hooray for the peace rallies in Washington, San Francisco and everywhere else! I'd have joined the hundreds of thousands of D.C. protesters, who braved weather colder than Nancy Reagan's heart, had I not been recovering from oral surgery and still bleeding.
Then again, the smell of blood might have been the one thing that would have attracted W to the rally. Actually, the smell of blood would have sent W scurrying to Nebraska but Shadow Emperor Cheney might have emerged from his crypt.
In any case, congratulations to all the participants for making such an eloquent collective statement against war. Excuse me if this is impertinent but aren't empty warheads the sort of thing we should be hoping the UN inspectors find?
Our current dilemma can be summarized thusly: an empty suit wants to use empty warheads to fill real graves.
In fairness, it must be remembered that Bush wants to fill pockets as well. Of course the pockets he wants to fill are already so jammed with lucre that oil company executives will soon have to start wearing cargo pants.
But please, nothing smaller than thousand-dollar bills! Cargo pants pockets aren't that big.
Secretary of War (retro titles for retro people) Donald Rumsfeld says the US has nearly exhausted all diplomatic options concerning Iraq. It's funny how almost no diplomacy exhausts America but it always has plenty of energy for war. And plenty of wars for energy.
His Iraq lunacy has so outraged the rest of the world that W couldn't beat the Ebola virus in an international popularity contest.
***** The Court-Appointed Bush Administration's insistence upon arresting and prosecuting medicinal marijuana growers and patients is consistent with everything it stands for.
First- Big Pharma doesn't get a cut and W believes no drug should reach sick people unless those scoundrels get the first and largest taste.
Second - Medicinal marijuana arrests will help overcrowd jails so that when justice eventually reaches the truly criminal enterprise in the White House, the odds will favor probation or light sentences for Bushists. In other words : Fill the Jails! (with other people)
Third - Medicinal marijuana was approved by California voters in 1996. If there is one thing the Court-Appointed Bush Administration cannot abide it is the will of an electorate with which it disagrees.
*******
As a tribute to the country that produces the majority of its products, America's largest retailer is considering renaming itself: The Great Wal-Mart of China. Sonny Perdue, the new Republican governor of Georgia (I think he beat Junior Tyson), has promised a statewide referendum on whether or not to return the Confederate battle emblem to the state flag. Polls indicate that residents of the purported center of the "New South" will vote to return the rallying symbol of slavery to their state banner. As of now the only hope is to add a new flag, featuring a swastika, to the list of ballot choices, thereby dividing the Confedrate battle emblem vote
Cutting down on its traditionally long commute to the truth on Venezuela, the New York Times failed to immediately indict Chavez supporters for shootings yesterday when it reported, "Each side blamed the other for the violence." In the past the Times would have immediately pinned the violence Chavez, only to be proven wrong. Of course in the past the Times still had reporters who had not yet been exposed as being anti-Chavez operatives. Until it can line up a new propagandist, the NYT is relegated to printing Reuters accounts. Thus the upgrade to half-truths. Let's cut to the chase, no matter what anyone tells you Condaleezza Rice's and Colin Powell's high-level collaboration with the court-appointed Bush Administration is nothing but an insult to the legacy of Martin Luther King . At the time of his assassination (by the same type of bigots Bush services and is currently attempting to elevate on the federal bench) Dr. King was a vocal and articulate opponent of the Vietnam War. His legacy was alive and well at the peace marches that highlighted the holiday weekend in his honor - a holiday cavemen like George W. Bush never wanted.
No matter what anyone tells you, King's legacy will never accompany Powell and Rice into a cynical and sinister war for oil. **** Combining its penchant for gluttonous oil consumption with its never-ending quest to pander to wealthy and corporate interests, W's latest tax scam actually allow businesses to immediately deduct the entire price of fully-loaded XXL S.U.V.'s, such as the Hummer H2, the Lincoln Navigator, the Ford Expedition and the Toyota Land Cruiser. And then it allows a myriad of additional deductions as their "investment" depreciates. According to the fringe-whacko, tree-hugging environmentalists at the New York Times, ".... a business owner, taking full advantage, could buy a BMW X5 sport utility vehicle for a few hundred dollars more than a Pontiac Bonneville sedan."
Next Bush will come up with a tax break to help compensate business people for all the time they lose pulling their mammoth vehicles into gas stations.
This flimflam doesn't just apply to businesses that could have some plausibly believable use for such large vehicles, it also applies to doctors, accountants, insurance agents and so on. Just how much paper can one accountant push? Or haul? I mean outside of the Andersen accountants who hauled ass to get as many Enron documents into the shredder and out of the building as quickly as possible..
***
Speaking to a predominantly African-American church congregation on MLK Day, Bush suggested that faith was the only way to overcome prejudice....because his administration has no interest whatsoever in tackling the issue
I have faith-- in the power of constitutional provisions that allow us to impeach scumbags like George W. Bush. I've never seen FOX's "Joe Millionaire" but according to an ad, this guy makes 19 grand a year operating heavy construction equipment. How about joining a union, Joe? And why is it so shocking that people could be conned into believing some poor moron is actually a rich moron? Hell, millions of people (who get their news from FOX) already believe some rich moron is actually a legitimate president.
And unless I missed it, FOX discreetly stopped using the NASCAR promo that featured a Confederate flag. Maybe the good folks of Georgia will rise up and force FOX to bring it back. With its racist symbols (pan any crowd more than five yards and you'll see a Confedrate flag) and obscenely conspicuous consumption of petroleum, is there anything more perfect for the court-appointed Bush era than NASCAR? *** Private Victory -- Public Loss
Nancy Victory, an assistant commerce secretary and the Court-appointed Bush Administration's top official for telecommunications policy, let lobbyists for wireless companies help pay for a party celebrating her new job. 10 days later she urged a major policy change that removed restrictions on cellular phone Goliaths. She never reported this gift on her government disclosure forms. "Many of the attendees had nothing to do with that issue," an indignant Victory said when questioned about this ethical imbroglio. Right -- they came to the party at her Virginia home with spouses or friends who were interested in the issue but they had nothing to do with it themselves. Obviously only some of the guests were focused on that one issue. It isn't as if she's stupid enough to waste a party like that on bribes centered on a single area of her influence. No doubt she has been doing favors for everything from the shrimp to the champagne ever since this October 2001 gala. Who cares if it was held within sniffing distance of the smoky carnage at the Pentagon? It was time for the country to get back to normal and normal under this regime meant that a horrific tragedy wasn't about to ball up the wheels of corruption. As we were to see again and again, 9/11 greased those crooked wheels -- as often as not with oil. But anyone willing to tithe the taxes Bush helps them dodge and present that fraction for use by the Republiscam National Committee receives prompt and courteous service for whatever they need fixed, overlooked or subsidized. So this assistant commerce secretary is just another Victory for corrupt corporate interests.
Now that we all have her cell number, it's time to call Nancy Victory and tell her to Lose her job.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Please click to sign up for the e-mail version of :CrimQuips List.
© 2003 Barry Crimmins